Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Grief Is A Bitch

When our good family friend passed away, I wanted to die so that I could be with her. I was angry, upset and depressed and I cried for about 6 months. Cleaning out her house and having the burden of going through her things and deciding what to do with everything took a toll on my emotional well being. This was long before I realized that I was an atheist.

That all came back when I received a call that my good friend of over 30 years lost her brother. Their family is very religious and they would be somewhat disappointed in the route I've taken. I used to go to church with them on holidays and they were a very positive influence on me from the ages of 14 to 18. Although they'd probably forgive me, I keep my feelings and opinions a secret from them.

Losing a friend is never easy but when they are only 45 years old, it makes me really mad and upset. When I spoke to the father of the friend who passed away today, he said over and over again how he finds peace and comfort in knowing that his son is with the Lord and God. His sister has said the same thing on facebook.

Where do atheists find peace and comfort in death? Because once again, I'm just sad, angry and upset.